Chapter Three; Searching
The light of this early winter’s day dwindled feebly and gave way to the night’s dark gaze. My battered converse shoes weren’t as warm as they’d once been and weren’t exactly water proof either. One last kick in the head were the rain drops which decided to throw themselves from the heavy grey clouds clinging to the sky above. I squinted my eyes at the watch on my wrist; wishing to myself that I would have paid the £5 extra for the glow in the dark version, as I struggled to focus on the time. 2.43 am How long have I been walking?
I walked the route I take to school and then just kept walking on by. Swirling thoughts had been mingling around with each other inside of my over the past hours but it was only now that I realised that I had no clue of where I was going or what I would or even could do when I got there. In the rush to get away, I’d stuffed my savings, which I usually stash safely under my mattress, into the back pocket of my jeans. £43.78 How long will that last?
Hood up, hands in pockets and head down I strode confidently down the pavements I no longer recognised. The last thing I wanted now was to be stopped by some blokes looking to cause trouble for girls like me. I’ve read stories about victims like them. I don’t think I could cope being one of them.
I amble past another bus shelter and catch the eye of someone watching me. Fear swells within me now. Calm down Joey. My heart beat’s racing now. You’re overreacting. The stranger’s stare follows me as my right hand feels for the mp3 player in my pocket. I scrabble to turn it up and feel myself begin to relax as the lyrics from “Brothers in a hotel bed” by my favourite band flood into my mind, washing away the real world.
“...as our December sun is setting because I'm not who I used to be... Cause now we say goodnight from our own separate sides ...”
With stiff, aching legs I proceed to trudge along, making up conversations in my mind to keep myself company. All the things I wish I’d had the nerve to say but never ever built up the courage to. I check my watch again, feeling my eyes droop lethargically. 3.19 am.
I look around me, the dank, orange glow from the streetlamp towering over me isn’t illuminating much of my surroundings but I can’t see anyone. I walk to the left of the pavement and lean wearily against the wall of a building. An air condition unit is pumping out hot air from within the building. Who’s rich enough to use air conditioning in the Winter?
I slide my back down the wall until I’m sitting with my knees hugged tightly to my chest. Cars rush past where I’m sitting, along the road. I wonder where they’re going at this time of night. A tangent of muddling thoughts race through my tiring mind and just for a second, I rest my eyes...
I began writing this months ago in English but only started writing again today. It's far from perfect regarding spelling and grammar but I hope you enjoy it. Please give me your feedback :D